Hey everybody! As some of you know, Jeremy and I went on a missions trip to Puerto Rico this past July. I am going to share with you about our trip and the ways that God has moved in our hearts. I have really debated about putting up this post for a lot of reasons. One is that this is very personal, and I am not sure if I want to share something so personal with so many people. However, I also know that being vulnerable allows others to see your weaknesses, and then in turn, they feel they can be open about their own weaknesses. I also want to share the amazing things God did. He is the one who changes hearts, and he changed me and Jeremy in some very significant ways. So, with all that said, I have decided to share some very personal things that God did in my life on this missions trip.
I need to apologize for the layout and organization--I just haven't had the time to really do this well. Please bear with me as things may seem repetitive or long-winded. I hope that I was able to do this without it, but being talkative is a weakness of mine!
To start, I will share a verse with you that the PPM trip leader, Mel, shared with us. It is Habakkuk 1:1-5. In the first five verses, the author is asking God how long he will have to call for help, and why he must see so much suffering and violence in the world. God answers and says, "Look at the nations and watch--and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told."
This verse explains so much how I feel about sharing this experience. It is hard to put into words. It feels impossible to communicate the feelings and emotions I experienced. All I can say is that unless you have experienced something like this, it is hard to understand. It's hard to understand how you can become so attached to people in such a short amount of time. It's hard to believe that God could change hearts and bond people together the way that he did in the six days we were together. This is something that I can tell you about, but you will never fully understand unless you see it for yourself. So, with all of my heart, I encourage you to go! If your church is taking a missions trip, make plans to go. Especially if you are young and single. It's the perfect time to uproot yourself and not have to worry about who it is affecting. It is one of my biggest regrets that I didn't do this when I was younger.
I need to apologize for the layout and organization--I just haven't had the time to really do this well. Please bear with me as things may seem repetitive or long-winded. I hope that I was able to do this without it, but being talkative is a weakness of mine!
To start, I will share a verse with you that the PPM trip leader, Mel, shared with us. It is Habakkuk 1:1-5. In the first five verses, the author is asking God how long he will have to call for help, and why he must see so much suffering and violence in the world. God answers and says, "Look at the nations and watch--and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told."
This verse explains so much how I feel about sharing this experience. It is hard to put into words. It feels impossible to communicate the feelings and emotions I experienced. All I can say is that unless you have experienced something like this, it is hard to understand. It's hard to understand how you can become so attached to people in such a short amount of time. It's hard to believe that God could change hearts and bond people together the way that he did in the six days we were together. This is something that I can tell you about, but you will never fully understand unless you see it for yourself. So, with all of my heart, I encourage you to go! If your church is taking a missions trip, make plans to go. Especially if you are young and single. It's the perfect time to uproot yourself and not have to worry about who it is affecting. It is one of my biggest regrets that I didn't do this when I was younger.
To start, I will explain a little about how we ended up going on this trip. I have worked for Matt Pfingsten, the president/CEO of Praying Pelican Missions, for the past three years. He owns a travel agency, and I worked from home for him doing administrative work while my kids were little. To make a long story short, my job has transitioned into 32 hrs/week, and I now work for PPM. I became an official employee a couple months ago. One of the benefits of working for the company is being able to go on a missions trip and bring a family member or friend with you. I have really wanted Jeremy to see what PPM was all about for a long time, and I knew he would be perfect to bring as a staff member for this trip. There was no question that I was bringing him.
When I first looked into going, I asked to go to Haiti. Ever since the earthquake, my heart has gone out to this country as you can see the great need they still have. I was disappointed to hear that because I was inquiring so late in the game, the only country where they had need for extra staff was Puerto Rico. I was not very excited. I was really wanting to go to a foreign country. Even though Puerto Rico is very different from the U.S., it's still a territory and therefore didn't seem appealing. I basically asked if there was any other place besides Puerto Rico that we could serve! I was told that, no, Puerto Rico was the only country where they had any real need. So we went to Puerto Rico. Little did I know that God had plans for us that we were not aware of--and that Puerto Rico was exactly where we were supposed to be!
When we arrived, Mel was meeting with the pastor we would be working with two hours away--so she had a driver pick us up. His name was Choy. He was the sweetest, kindest man who showed us all around San Juan. His brother was also visiting from out of town--both of them were older men. Choy was the funny jokester (typical youngest child) and Tato was his older brother. Tato was very educated and we talked with him about the economic situation in Puerto Rico. He had lived in Puerto Rico growing up, but when the economy started to fail, he lost his job. He told us a very cool story about how he has his current job.
His mother called him and told him he needed to attend a family members wedding. He said he wanted to, but he didn't have money to buy a suit so he could attend or to buy a gift. She was very adamant that he attend, so he decided to put the money on his credit card. He went to the mall to buy this suit. As he was getting ready to pay, the cashier asked him "cash" or "credit"? He said, "credit." Right then, as the woman asked him, are you Tato (Regretfully, I don't know his last name)? He said, "yes I am." She said, "I will never forget the sound of your voice. You used to call my brother every day and I could hear it through the phone. He owns some hotels in Mazatlan and they are looking for a manger. You should give him a call." Are you kidding me?! This woman remembered the sound of his voice and his name! She had an incredible memory--but God also used her to connect Tato to an old friend that had a job for him. He had to move to Mexico, but he is now doing okay financially and God provided for him. It was an amazing story to hear.
After Choy took us to eat and gave us a tour of Old San Juan, we met up with our team leader, Mel. She is from Pennsylvania, and someone I have been acquainted with through meetings at PPM. I was excited to work with her. She introduced us to another team leader we would be working with until Tuesday--Chase. He looked young, but we learned he was 22 and in school to be a Physician Assistant--and eventually one day wanted to use that on the mission field. He had dark hair and bright blue eyes. As much as we would have wanted to hear his story and talk, we were exhausted from getting up early that morning, so we went to bed. However, we did get to talk with him a few days later. Chase ended up making strong connections with us as well as some of the participants on the trip.
The next day, Mel took us out to breakfast with Choy, Tato, Chase, and Mara--a translator for PPM and a local resident). We had the best coffee we had ever had in our lives. We also got to try pastries with fresh fruit and flan. It was an amazing breakfast! After we were done, Mel let us in on the plan for the day. We were going to pick up the team at the airport--I was in charge of finding them and guiding them to where they would be picked up. Jeremy would wait by the bus with the luggage. I was nervous because this was the first time I had ever been in charge of a missions team!
Shortly after we arrived at the airport, Mel let me know I would be in charge of getting our team to the beach where we would be eating lunch. She said the bus driver does not like to follow directions, so I needed to be firm and sure of where we were going. I was a little nervous to say the least. I got out of the car and went to baggage claim to look for the team. While I was waiting, I met Alejandra and Eduardo. They were two Puerto Ricans who were hired by PPM to be translators. Right away I hit it off with both of them. Eduardo is soft spoken and the sweetest boy you will ever meet. Alejandra was friendly and outgoing--both are 18 years old. Alejandra was sweating just as badly as me, which I thought was funny because she is a local! I offered her a hair band to tie up her hair and it was the start of an amazing friendship (of course I knew nothing of that at the time). If I had known what these two would mean to me at the end of the week, I would have welcomed them with giant hugs. Believe it or not, I am an introvert, so I can be friendly, but slow to really dive in to talking at length with people. So I was nice but focused on the job and getting the team where they needed to go.
I did notice right away that Alejandra had a big personality. Although not afraid to speak her mind or let you know what she thinks, she always did it in a humorous way that made you laugh. Despite how outspoken she is, she is also so sweet and loving at the same time. She mentioned that she is very close to her mom and sister, and that it was very hard to say goodbye to them that morning. She said she was going to miss them very much while we were two hours south. She is only 18 and has not spent much time apart from her family. Eduardo is also 18 and they grew up going to the same church. They said they were like a brother and sister.
We finally spotted the team and directed them outside. Right away, one of the students beamed at me and said, "Como te llamas?" I said, "Are you asking me my name?" She nodded and smiled. I said "Mandy." She said "me llama Kendall. I am practicing my Spanish." I didn't know it at the time, but God had planned a very special group of kids for us to be leading this week--in fact, they inspired Jeremy and I in so many ways.
We got everyone loaded on the bus and headed two hours south to Patillas--the small town where we would be serving a local Methodist Church. Alejandra and I sat next to each other and I asked her a few questions about herself. I learned that she was going to school in August to start studying to be a nurse. She said she would one day like to do nursing on the mission field, but the short term plan is to move to Florida when she is done with school. She said bi-lingual nurses make a lot of money because of the demand. Puerto Rico is a poor country, but many of them are truly giving their kids a gift by teaching them both Spanish and English. There is a huge need in many states for people who can speak both languages.
Looking back, I wish I would have taken more time to talk with Alejandra on that bus ride, but again, I didn't know her well and decided to read a book instead! Little did I know that the bus ride home I would be wishing for every minute to move slower so I wouldn't have to say goodbye to her! So instead of using the valuable time I had been given with her, I enjoyed the beautiful scenery as we passed through the mountains on our way to Patillas. I also read a book.
I have to take a moment to laugh at myself now. As an introvert, it can be so tempting to put people aside for our own comfort. However, when God places people in our lives, he always wants us to take time for them. It is definitely an area where I need to grow, and hopefully I can use this experience to remind myself to put the book down and take the time to talk with the people God has put in front of me.
I have to take a moment to laugh at myself now. As an introvert, it can be so tempting to put people aside for our own comfort. However, when God places people in our lives, he always wants us to take time for them. It is definitely an area where I need to grow, and hopefully I can use this experience to remind myself to put the book down and take the time to talk with the people God has put in front of me.
Once we got to the church, we were welcomed by the all the local members. They handed out Puerto Rican flags and played music for us as we entered. They gave us hugs and kisses and were so excited to see us. The team, First Presbyterian Church of Ashboro, NC, had been there two years ago. The kids were so excited to see the friends they had previously made. Alejandra and I went upstairs and chose beds next to each other.
We had dinner, and then Jeremy and I went outside to call our kids. They were doing well and excited to be at their Nana and Papa's. One thing we didn't realize about Puerto Rico is that it is considered part of the US when it comes to cell phone, money, etc. We had no problem using our phones and staying in contact with the kids. That was huge! In fact, it made it much easier to just settle in and enjoy our trip since the kids were only a phone call away. The other benefit of Puerto Rico is that most people at least understand English, even if they don't speak it. For someone like me whose primary gifts are speaking with people and praying for people, that was a big deal. Acts of service is not on the top of my list for ways to bless people, so I was a little nervous about this week where I would be working very hard every day!
The plan was for us to paint the outside of the their church. It was going to be a big job.
We would also be painting a sealant on their roof. They also have a giant new church building as well that needed sweeping--when I say sweeping I mean piles and piles of concrete dust. It was going to be a busy week!
At dinner the first couple nights, we sat together as a staff. It was really where we got to know Eduardo and Alejandra. Again, I was not prepared for how much I would like this girl. If any of you are familiar with the Myers Briggs personality test, I am an INFJ. Yes, this might make me a dork, but I love psychology and I don't apologize for it! Even though I am an introvert, I am actually 51% introvert, 49% extrovert. So...I'm actually very interested in people and will ask questions once I am comfortable. I had Alejandra take the test, and found out she is an ENFP--which is probably my favorite personality type. Outspoken, boisterous, and bubbly, these types of people are usually the life of the party. Alejandra was no exception. We also found out Chase was an INFJ--a rare type so I felt I had found a kindred spirit! If you want to know more about what I am talking about, you can read about it and take the test here. You should message me or comment what your results were--I love seeing what my friends and family are!
The first day of working, I was in charge of a group that would paint the interior of the church. I got to know Jeff, one of the adult leaders who had a daughter in the group. He is an ISTP, and we really hit it off. I know his type because he is actually the one who brought up Myers-Briggs to me. He was soft spoken and kind, and also had a really big heart. We really had a lot in common--one thing being dealing with mental health issues. His daughter has recently struggled with depression, and I opened up about the fact that I had diagnosed depression/anxiety for five years. I asked him parenting questions, and I really appreciated his kind and gentle heart. Talking with him made the time go by so fast, I didn't even notice I was sweating gallons and gallons of sweat! The 90+ heat didn't even seem to bother me. I love that man!
That evening, we had some ministry training. Mel talked about how we all have a personal story--our growing up, our struggles, and how we came to know God. She broke us up into groups and we all told our stories to each other. I got to hear how two of the girls in my group have also struggled with depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues. Another adult leader in the group, Kim, and I talked for probably an hour afterwards about the seeming rise in these conditions--especially among young people. We definitely have some theories about why this is. She is also a special ed teacher, which warmed my heart, as I have two kids with issues!
Throughout the week, I bonded with different kids as we worked next to each to each other. I got to hear their stories and I started to realize that most of them have a very strong faith and a real relationship with God. This blew my stereotype of Presbyterians out of the water! I am a little ashamed to admit it, but I did have a stereotype of Presbyterians. I just assumed this group would be a bunch of nice people, but the relationship with God would not go very deep. I think it's safe to say that I was very wrong, and I will try very hard not to judge someone based on a label!
Another thing that this group did that went against the stereotype was something called the prayer chair. Basically, the lights are turned off, and one person sits on a chair in the middle of the group. They talk about their struggles and the things they are needing prayer for. I don't know how much you know about teenagers, but I have worked with them in the past. It is a big struggle to get them to open up about what is going on inside. They care a lot about what others think of them, so being vulnerable can be very tough to do. Not only did these kids open up to the adults in the group about what they were going through, but they opened up to each other. Then the kids prayed for each other! Out loud! It was just such an amazing experience to see these kids grow closer to each other and closer to God throughout the week as they shared their struggles. I can't even put into words the incredible amount of healing that God did through that prayer chair. I was in awe.
On Tuesday, we had to say goodbye to Chase. He was leading a trip with another leader who had come in and a group was also coming in. Even in three days, we felt the loss as he had to head out. Even though he was quiet, he really bonded with Jeremy and opened up to us about his story. He shared some of the weaknesses and struggles he had been through as a young college student--and how he had grown from that experience. We really feel he is a solid young man and God has big things in store for him in his future. It was a privilege to get to know him.
The next few days, were very similar. We would get up in the morning, eat breakfast, and head out for our morning project (the group was either teaching VBS to the young kids in the Puerto Rican Church/Community, painting the old church buildling, or cleaning and sweeping the new building). The temperature was usually in the 90's with lots and lots of humidity! Jeremy and I probably sweated out our body weight ten times over! We drank and drank water to make sure we didn't get dehydrated.
Another way I had to grow and stretch on this trip was not to care about my looks. If you know me, I really love doing my hair and makeup. I don't like looking like I am not put together. I guess you could say it's a weakness! I had to let all vanity go and be okay with looking like a hot mess (literally). I also had to be a leader to the kids and not let myself care! God gave me the grace, because it didn't really bother me that much!
After the morning project, we would take a break for lunch. Then it was back out to our projects for three more hours of work! Once the project times were done, we came back for dinner. After dinner is usually when people showered. Again, I had to be okay with not feeling clean, as I would begin to sweat again 15 minutes out of the shower! I just had to be okay with feeling sweaty. Once again, God gave me grace for it all. The heat and humidity really didn't bother me all that much. And even though my primary gifts are not in serving, I worked very hard each day and felt a sense of accomplishment when we saw our progress. Those of you who know me will be amazed. Jeremy really was as he saw how hard I was working and not caring about being tired and sweaty. He came away with a new appreciation for his wife!
Once we had dinner, we would have a couple hours of down time. Then it would be time for the evening meeting which would be lead by Mel. We would talk about the day and where we saw God at work. Then each night, a different set of kids would lead a devotion and worship. After that it would be time for the prayer chair. Every single night these kids would stay up late to pray for others. It was an amazing thing to see.
The next few days, were very similar. We would get up in the morning, eat breakfast, and head out for our morning project (the group was either teaching VBS to the young kids in the Puerto Rican Church/Community, painting the old church buildling, or cleaning and sweeping the new building). The temperature was usually in the 90's with lots and lots of humidity! Jeremy and I probably sweated out our body weight ten times over! We drank and drank water to make sure we didn't get dehydrated.
Another way I had to grow and stretch on this trip was not to care about my looks. If you know me, I really love doing my hair and makeup. I don't like looking like I am not put together. I guess you could say it's a weakness! I had to let all vanity go and be okay with looking like a hot mess (literally). I also had to be a leader to the kids and not let myself care! God gave me the grace, because it didn't really bother me that much!
After the morning project, we would take a break for lunch. Then it was back out to our projects for three more hours of work! Once the project times were done, we came back for dinner. After dinner is usually when people showered. Again, I had to be okay with not feeling clean, as I would begin to sweat again 15 minutes out of the shower! I just had to be okay with feeling sweaty. Once again, God gave me grace for it all. The heat and humidity really didn't bother me all that much. And even though my primary gifts are not in serving, I worked very hard each day and felt a sense of accomplishment when we saw our progress. Those of you who know me will be amazed. Jeremy really was as he saw how hard I was working and not caring about being tired and sweaty. He came away with a new appreciation for his wife!
Once we had dinner, we would have a couple hours of down time. Then it would be time for the evening meeting which would be lead by Mel. We would talk about the day and where we saw God at work. Then each night, a different set of kids would lead a devotion and worship. After that it would be time for the prayer chair. Every single night these kids would stay up late to pray for others. It was an amazing thing to see.
Another amazing thing that happened was connecting with the youth pastor from FPC. Her name was Stephanie. She told us that she had been praying for the PPM leaders of their trip for two years. She wanted her team to have an even better experience than they had last time--though they weren't sure it was possible. She said God answered their prayers like a Tsunami. She said they were blown away by how amazing this trip was--and how the PPM leaders were so great. I find it humorous now that Jeremy and I only knew for six weeks we would be taking this trip, and Stephanie had been praying for us for two years! She also told me she noticed how I can pour out love on the girls--and they can feel that. She also said she asks God to bring her leaders that are strong where she is weak--and makeup and looking girly are not her thing! As you will read below, she was definitely a tomboy! She told me the story of how she came to be the youth pastor--and how God had his hand all over that.
She also told me her testimony which I would like to share because it's one of the most dramatic stories I have ever heard. When she was seven months old, she was walking. When she was two, she was dribbling a basketball. She became a child prodigy for playing basketball--the best player in the state of North Carolina. She had a dream of one day playing for North Carolina in college and going to the Olympics. When she was 11 years old, her dad was diagnosed with cancer. He died five weeks later. That was devastating to her as she was daddy's girl-- and she became extremely angry. To make matters worse, her mom started dating a guy nine months after her dad died. She is very gifted with words, but before she came to know Christ, her words were not always used for the best. She told her mom all the time that she thought her new guy was a loser, and how could she go from her dad to this guy? She also said it directly to him. Soon after they started dating, her mom moved in with this man. She tried to get Stephanie to see him as a father figure, so when Stephanie asked to do something, she would say, go ask Ray. That made Stephanie so angry that she stopped asking for permission to do things. She would take her mom's car all the time when she was 13 and go out driving with her friends.
One day, her and a friend toilet papered her friends house. When they drove by the house to check out their work, her friend's dad and the sheriff were in the front yard. The dad quickly pointed out Stephanie and her friend. They were on a dead end street, so once they got to the end, they had to turn around and go back. The cop immediately pulled her over. As he approached the car, her friend yelled to her to step on the gas and run. So a 15 car police chase ensued. When she was finally caught she was arrested. Now Stephanie had never really experienced consequences because she was so good at basketball. Every time she got in trouble in school, her coach would come bail her out so she could play ball. This time she was in really big trouble, but because her coaches stood up for her in court, she was given a slap on the wrist. She started to feel like she could do anything without consequences. As she mentioned before, she was a very angry person. If you looked at her wrong, she would come over to you to try and pick a fight.
One day, her and a friend toilet papered her friends house. When they drove by the house to check out their work, her friend's dad and the sheriff were in the front yard. The dad quickly pointed out Stephanie and her friend. They were on a dead end street, so once they got to the end, they had to turn around and go back. The cop immediately pulled her over. As he approached the car, her friend yelled to her to step on the gas and run. So a 15 car police chase ensued. When she was finally caught she was arrested. Now Stephanie had never really experienced consequences because she was so good at basketball. Every time she got in trouble in school, her coach would come bail her out so she could play ball. This time she was in really big trouble, but because her coaches stood up for her in court, she was given a slap on the wrist. She started to feel like she could do anything without consequences. As she mentioned before, she was a very angry person. If you looked at her wrong, she would come over to you to try and pick a fight.
Once she got to her senior year, she finally got the scholarship she had dreamed of--to play for Carolina. She was in the last high school game, the championship, when she made a big mistake. The ref was calling fouls on her when she was not giving fouls. After the fourth one, she got so angry she got right up in his face and started screaming. Then she punched him in the face and he fell on the ground cold. She was disqualified from the game, and Carolina backed out of her scholarship. All her dreams were dead. For the first time in her life, she had experienced consequences. She became addicted to drugs and alcohol, was still an angry person, but she was able to hold down a job.
She had an aunt that would pray for her and try to talk to her about God, but she would have none of it. In fact, she instantly closed her ears anytime someone tried to tell her about God. She told her aunt she wanted a relationship with her, but did not want to hear about God.
Her aunt would invite her to go on cruises, and one day when she was 33, her aunt invited her on a European cruise. She filled her carry on bag full of chocolate, and all the rest of her stuff was in her suitcase.
Her aunt always had an unspoken rule that if you spent the night at her house on a Saturday night, you went to church with her the next morning. Since she didn't want to go to church, she let her aunt know she would be driving home that night after their plane landed.
When they arrived at the airport, the airline had lost her bag. It was in Kansas but would be back at 3:00 in the afternoon the next day. She had to stay at her aunts house.
The next morning, she went to church with her aunt. She said they hadn't even gotten to the chorus of the first worship song before God had wrapped his arms around her and enveloped her in his love. She fell to the floor and couldn't even move. Four guys from the church came and picked her up and carried her to the altar. The entire church gathered around her and prayed. She said she beat that altar and screamed for an hour. When it was over, she walked away free from alcohol, drugs and anger. A couple years later she became the youth pastor for the youth group she now leads. What an amazing story of how God will always reach out to us, even if we don't want him to! He truly picks us, we do not pick him.
The leaders of this group also impacted us in a very special way. Stephanie is the most intensely loving person you will meet. Her hugs are like bear hugs, and if she holds you for more than a minute--you will literally cry--I know I did! Jeff is the kind of man every girl would want for a father. Kind, soft spoken, and gentle, he is literally a picture of who God is. Beth is the sweetest, most kind woman. She just exudes God's love. Kim and Carl were very much role models--especially for Jeremy. He said he wants to be Kim and Carl someday. He felt Carl was so inspirational in the way he worked and interacted with the kids. He also thought it was so awesome that even though their own kids are grown and gone, they were still helping in youth ministry. All of these people were parental figures to us in some way, and having to say goodbye to them was especially tough for us.
As I have said before, the kids were also very special. Even though they were young, they had a real relationship with God where they were vulnerable with each other. However, they also loved, accepted, and supported each other--even though they were all different ages and different types of people. We have never seen this before--it was so inspiring.
The leaders of this group also impacted us in a very special way. Stephanie is the most intensely loving person you will meet. Her hugs are like bear hugs, and if she holds you for more than a minute--you will literally cry--I know I did! Jeff is the kind of man every girl would want for a father. Kind, soft spoken, and gentle, he is literally a picture of who God is. Beth is the sweetest, most kind woman. She just exudes God's love. Kim and Carl were very much role models--especially for Jeremy. He said he wants to be Kim and Carl someday. He felt Carl was so inspirational in the way he worked and interacted with the kids. He also thought it was so awesome that even though their own kids are grown and gone, they were still helping in youth ministry. All of these people were parental figures to us in some way, and having to say goodbye to them was especially tough for us.
As I have said before, the kids were also very special. Even though they were young, they had a real relationship with God where they were vulnerable with each other. However, they also loved, accepted, and supported each other--even though they were all different ages and different types of people. We have never seen this before--it was so inspiring.
Things I have taken away from this trip:
1. The youth group was the kind of youth group that you dream of for your child. Every kid was accepted for who they were. The group was not cliquey. Even though the kids had stronger relationships with certain people, everyone was welcome to join in and get to know each other. The kids were open, vulnerable, and transparent about their struggles. They prayed for each other and were determined to be there for each other as they faced the challenges and temptations of high school. They had great adult leaders, but also had a couple of very strong student leaders. These students made it a point to get to know every person and make the group a cohesive unit. There simply was not a lot of gossip and mean spirited jokes. It was amazing to see. Through this experience, Jeremy and I have realized that it is possible for this kind of thing to exist for our children--and we are going to pray for it, and do what we can to make it happen.
2. God did a huge healing in our marriage. Without sharing too much, I will say that since having kids, Jeremy and I have struggled with many things most couples do. One of them being letting little things get to us and steal the joy and ability to the enjoy the person we are married to. I think God showed both of us that we are a team and there is a purpose and a reason in why we are together. He gave us a knew appreciation for one another.
3. Jeremy realized how gifted he is at relating to kids. As a teacher, you have to be careful and guarded about what you share with students. You also have to have a very clear line between friend/teacher. Because of this, you are limited in how much you can open up to kids. Jeremy got the chance to really speak into kids lives this week, and share some of his past mistakes and how God has taken him through that. He also realized that he would really enjoy being a trip leader for PPM. He is looking into exploring that. I also realized that I have not allowed my life to have a lot of meaning and purpose outside of raising my kids and the job I do for PPM. I was really stuck in a rut in my own relationship with God and really spending time on things that water down my connection with him. I am going to try to live with more purpose and use my time wisely. I also have felt a pull to be more active in missions with PPM. Jeremy and I are praying and exploring what that means for us a family. Obviously God would have to show us and lead the way--especially financially.
We are both talking to our home church about leading another trip to Puerto Rico next year. We have already talked to PPM and are working on setting a date!
We are both talking to our home church about leading another trip to Puerto Rico next year. We have already talked to PPM and are working on setting a date!
4. I allowed myself to become close to a teenager for the first time in a long time. Alejandra caught me off guard with her beautiful, energetic, and happy personality. She is also very unique in that she is very outspoken and carefree--but she doesn't have an edge. Most people I have met like this are very outspoken and say it like it is, but they also have huge walls up and can be very hurtful with their words. This is the first time I have met someone like her who wears her heart on her sleeve and has such a huge capacity to love. She poured her heart out to me this week.
One night one of the students shared that he was struggling in this faith. I went upstairs by myself to get ready for bed--while most of the kids had stayed up to pray. Alejandra came upstairs and asked me to listen without judging her. She shared that when this kid had talked, he was expressing exactly how she felt. It was like he was saying the same words she would have said. She confessed some things to me, and then I prayed for her. I listened to her and held her as she cried. She let the spirit of God come in a take away the pain and the shame of some of her choices. I got to be a part of seeing her healed, and that was a huge blessing. I am sure God could have used someone else to help her, but he chose for me to be there. I really believe I was supposed to be and God hand picked me to be the person she could talk to. Jeremy and I have basically adopted her as a daughter and I plan to keep in touch with her long term. She will be coming to visit us in December when she has a break from school.
The reason that I had not gotten close to a teenager in a long time is a long story, so I will give the short version. When Jeremy and I were first married, we helped with a youth group. I led a small group of girls, and got extremely close to them. In fact, one of my best friends is one of those girls. Her and I had such a strong connection that we have always remained close.
However, there is another girl that I got close to that I hardly speak to at all now. We hit it off right away, and we were kindred spirits. She had a tough family life, and I became like a mom/older sister to her. Unfortunately, our church ended up having some issues that impacted our youth group. The youth pastor and another key leader were leaving, and it broke this girls heart. Jeremy and I were also open to the possibility of moving for a job (that never panned out), and I shared that with her. She basically felt like she had been abandoned. A couple months after all this happened, she began getting involved in a dangerous lifestyle. There were days when no one knew where she was and I didn't know if she was alive or dead. It was a terrifying experience, and it broke my heart into a million pieces. A few months later, something significant happened in her family, and she decided she would quit making harmful choices. Today she is alive and well so praise God for that. Unfortunately, even though she quit the dangerous lifestyle choices, she wanted nothing to do with God. I'm sure she was angry about her family's situation, the church split that affected our youth group, and just the hard life she had had previous to that. She basically cut ties with me and everyone else she was close to. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever had to deal with and something I still cry about at times. I'm not sure where she is at with God today, but her and I have never reconnected (not for lack of trying on my part).
So, back to Alejandra. This girl made me realize that I can take a chance and love kids again. That the possible hurt is worth it. If I hadn't opened my heart to her, she would not have felt safe enough to talk with me about her struggles. Being used by God is a blessing, and he used me to help her. I am open to working with teenagers again--and I also really enjoyed it! Being able to be close to her was very healing for me. Who knows how God will use me now that I am actually open to working with kids again? We are praying about our options to move forward with working with teenagers.
5. Being in Puerto Rico was very eye opening. However, there is one other place that was eye opening to me, and that was Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. Just a little north of Miami, this is a smaller town but still has all the culture of Puerto Rico, Cuba, and Mexico (along with many other central/south american people who have come for a better life). It is a melting pot, and so symbolic of the larger world. There are many opportunities in this place to live a missional life--which in my mind is ultimately the goal. We are in prayer about this place and what God may have, if anything, for us there. This too, is a huge step for Jeremy. He was absolutely against moving to Florida previous to this trip. Now he is being open-handed with God about this.
This trip meant so much to us in so many ways. God used the people and circumstances to do a great work in both our hearts. We are so grateful that I work for a company who provides this kind of experience for their employees. I am so grateful for Matt and Gina Pfingsten. I am thankful to Matt for following the dreams God have him, and for Gina to support him and encourage him to do so. Without these two people, none of this would exist. I am sure God could use other avenues, but he has chosen to use them in this way, and we are so blessed to call them friends, work for them, and have them in our lives!
I apologize for the length of this blog post. If you have reached the end, congratulations, you deserve a medal! I wanted to break it up, but just ran out of time. Thank you for reading this and taking an interest in what we did in Puerto Rico and how God touched our hearts. Please pray for us as we think and decide what lies ahead!
5. Being in Puerto Rico was very eye opening. However, there is one other place that was eye opening to me, and that was Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. Just a little north of Miami, this is a smaller town but still has all the culture of Puerto Rico, Cuba, and Mexico (along with many other central/south american people who have come for a better life). It is a melting pot, and so symbolic of the larger world. There are many opportunities in this place to live a missional life--which in my mind is ultimately the goal. We are in prayer about this place and what God may have, if anything, for us there. This too, is a huge step for Jeremy. He was absolutely against moving to Florida previous to this trip. Now he is being open-handed with God about this.
This trip meant so much to us in so many ways. God used the people and circumstances to do a great work in both our hearts. We are so grateful that I work for a company who provides this kind of experience for their employees. I am so grateful for Matt and Gina Pfingsten. I am thankful to Matt for following the dreams God have him, and for Gina to support him and encourage him to do so. Without these two people, none of this would exist. I am sure God could use other avenues, but he has chosen to use them in this way, and we are so blessed to call them friends, work for them, and have them in our lives!
I apologize for the length of this blog post. If you have reached the end, congratulations, you deserve a medal! I wanted to break it up, but just ran out of time. Thank you for reading this and taking an interest in what we did in Puerto Rico and how God touched our hearts. Please pray for us as we think and decide what lies ahead!
